The book centers around Joan grieving her husband John after his death. She recalls every single detail—the ones she can remember, and also takes us through the ones she doesn’t.
This book made me feel lucky. Lucky to have a long life left to live. The one thing I also felt while reading it was awareness. It made me aware of the short time we have with the ones we love.
What I found most impressive about this book was how honest and raw Joan is. I was surprised by how much she allowed us into her mind during such an incredibly vulnerable moment in her life. She doesn’t try to make sense of everything or make grief look any prettier than it is. She lets us see the confusion, the memories, the thoughts that contradict each other, and the small details that suddenly mean everything.
Something else I found interesting was how she incorporates medical information and real facts about what grief does to the brain. She goes beyond the emotional side of losing someone and explores the neurological effects of grief, giving a more tangible explanation to some of the things we experience when we lose someone we love. It made me think about how grief isn’t just something we feel; it can affect the way we think, remember, concentrate, and move through the world.
It also made me think about how important it is to choose your partner well. Joan writes, “I did not always think he was right but we were each the person the other trusted.” I think there is something beautiful about this kind of love. Not necessarily agreeing on everything, but knowing that this is the person you can trust with your life.
Read if you need a reminder of how precious an ordinary day can be, if you are in love, if you have ever lost someone, or if you simply need to be reminded that we don’t have as much time as we think we do.